Friday, February 22, 2013

The Lost Art of Seduction

Quest - 022213 - Miz B
Sex is so obvious, so basic, so boring.   Yes, I said it!   Now before you freak out, let me finish.  Let's face it - the body parts can only be combined in so many ways ... and no matter how skilled you may be at the old in & out, it's frankly quite uninspiring!   But wait ... we all know that sex is fabulous and fierce and occasionally a religious experience.  So where does this amazing variation in passion and skills come from?  SEDUCTION!

Just in case you haven't heard, the most incredible erogenous zone on a woman's body is her MIND!   Especially for (and I can't believe I'm skirting close to using the "mature" word) a more experienced woman like me, you'd better bring a pretty solid mental repertoire if you want to rock my world.  People ask me "what do you like?" and I say "with whom?"  They ask what I haven't done before  and I answer "with whom?"    It sounds smart-assed, but it's an honest answer ... it's not the "what" that varies, it's the "how" that each person brings to the table.   With minor variations, the notes are the same, but the symphony sounds very different when played by the Philharmonic than by a kindergarten class of recorders!

I think most women can attest that the difference between good sex and mind-blowing-oh-my-god-what-the-hell-just-happened-I-can't-feel-my-face-and-can-we-do-that-again sex is the mental "X-factor" that comes from seduction.  We can all tell the difference between a disengaged partner who is jacking off using our body and a lover who is in tune with our mental, emotional, and physical needs.   There is no shortcut for seduction ... for it to be effective, one must actually take the time to explore their lovers' shadows and venture into the depths of them together.  Formulaic, chick-flick seduction won't cut it ... for true bliss one must actually discover the unique magic in each moment, each person, each luscious dark twist of the mind.   Sometimes seduction is bubblebaths and champagne ... and sometimes it's knowing that before the night is out, you will be shoved up against a wall in some dark alley and fucked senseless!

Before this whole thing comes off as a sexist, all about romancing women post, let me say that I believe it is every bit as important to seduce men.  It just looks very different.  Still, it's a matter of not only learning where his buttons are, but being willing to push them without judgement.   Very often, I hear women complain about what men want in bed ... they just don't see how THAT is sexy or romantic.   They want to seduce him in the way that THEY want, instead of the way that HE wants.  Survey says: XXX {insert Family Feud buzzer here!}   Sorry ladies, no can do.   He doesn't need what you need, and selfish is the opposite of seductive!  The most successful relationships are those in which BOTH sets of shadows are honored, both fantasies fulfilled, both souls touched, and both bodies left in quivering gasping puddles on the floor!  










2 comments:

  1. One power of seduction is in the voice – some words should be just said, some growled, some left hanging, some moaned, some left silent, and some whispered.

    “Say heat. Say wet between my legs. Say legs. Seriously, I want you to. Stockings. Whisper it. The word is meant to be whispered.” Don DeLillo

    A seduction can be different with different people. It can be different for the same people but a different day. Maybe a woman that needs all romance and roses one day falls down the slippery slope merely because after a tough day she gets a neck rub followed by a good foot massage and sent off for a warm bath alone to relax.

    On seducing men. Well from a man’s perspective; your half way home by just being within our sphere of influence. Our buttons are more obvious and easier to push. A lot of times we are so focused on sending our signals that we totally miss that the woman is sending out her own. If we were aware of hers we wouldn’t need ours. It’s too bad that when our penis fills with blood it doesn’t shut about half our brain off to logical thinking and just leave reaction and feeling.

    “Her lips touched his brain as they touched his lips, as though they were a vehicle of some vague speech and between them he felt an unknown and timid pleasure, darker than the swoon of sin, softer than sound or odor.” James Joyce

    I think it is easier to seduce a man. I think we are pretty much a visual animal. We want to “see” as well as touch. What man is not rendered near speechless by the sudden glimpse up a skirt in a public place? He’s seen a naked pussy, he’s felt a naked pussy, he’s fucked a naked pussy – yet here is a covered one that captivates him. He starts to visualize it, hair - no hair, plump lips – thin lips, the color, the smell; his mind goes through every pussy he has ever seen trying to put some sort of image together while falling under the seduction of something he will never see. We are so easy.

    “Is not the most erotic portion of a body where the garment gapes? In perversion (which is the realm of textual pleasure) there are no "erogenous zones"; it is intermittence, as psychoanalysis has so rightly stated, which is erotic: the intermittence of skin flashing between two articles of clothing , between two edges; it is this flash itself which seduces, or rather: the staging of an appearance-as-disappearance. ” Roland Barthes

    As much as I want a woman to be naked, I love seduction of the glimpses, flashes and touching; the exploring of the boundaries of clothing and skin. Is it not sometimes more exciting to feel a nipple expand while still hidden beneath a bra? To feel her open shirt caress your sides as she pumps up and down; when she pulls out a tit from the folds to feed it to your sucking lips. To nuzzle her breast and then feel the rough little edges of the lace of her bra as you lick the edge along with the little beads of salty sweat clinging to her skin. To run your fingers over that little silk panel between her legs. To feel her body give under the cloth as the pressure of your tongue forces her lips apart and against the tight leg band. To feel her wetness mingle with yours as you pull at the panel with your lips and feel a slight resistance, a slight stickiness.

    “…and sometimes it's knowing that before the night is out,”
    And sometimes the seduction is the not knowing. Some of the mind part is the anticipation.

    “... they just don't see how THAT is sexy or romantic”
    One major problem is that sometimes WE don’t even know why “THAT” is sexy or romantic. Two things that trip my trigger and I have no reason for either. No story, no experience, no memory to draw upon as a reason why.
    A small space of nothing. The space when a slim woman closes her legs so her thighs are touching and there is a small open space right beneath her pussy lips. A little triangle of light sets the synapse firing rapidly.
    And ankle bracelets. Put both together she could just put a collar and leash on me and lead me around like a puppy.

    D.L. Wood

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  2. Incredible posting.... Sometimes telling your partner what you plan to do to them is as exciting as the actual act. To look into their eyes, breath in the scent, listen to the symphony of their sighs. Their moans... Taste every inch of their quivering body, in hopes to just make it quiver more... Then, the taste of their passion when they have lost complete control.... Followed by the hunger for it all over again the moment they are gone... The anticipation of a return performance.

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