Thursday, May 23, 2013

All Things in Moderation: Especially Moderation!!


Beauty is only skin deep. I think what's really important is finding a balance of mind, body and spirit. Somebody said to me not too long ago, 'Until you're twenty, you have the face you are born with, and after that you have the face you deserve,' and I really loved that - the idea that you wear who you are on your face.  ~Jennifer Lopez


What a fabulous way of looking at beauty!   I'm always trying to convince people that being a model isn't about being perfect, it's about being yourself and letting your spirit show through in your images.   I adore the idea that even my imperfections help to tell a story and make me more accessible than some creepily perfect Barbie doll supermodel.   

I think that balance is incredibly important to my craft and to any fulfilling life.   A friend from high school recently wrote to me with some very kind words about shadowsexposed and asked for my thoughts on balance ... which naturally set my mental gears a-grinding on the issue!   So many of us suffer from burnout ... others from boredom ... and some of us overachievers prefer to swing a wild pendulum arc between the two at regular intervals!   

St. Peter's Rome - 052313 - Miz B

Angels & Demons:  Nina - 052313 - Miz B


So how are we to prioritize and balance all our various responsibilities and desires?   I'm a model and a mother, a business woman and a daughter,  a writer and a friend,  a lover and a mentor,  a brat and a flirt,  a workaholic and a freak.   There's quite a three ring circus in my head most days and there are only so many hours to share it with the world!   

I suspect that women tend to struggle more with balance, trying to be all things to all people  ... between career and family, between being the women men dream of and the ones they wife, between being a good girl and being a desired minx.   Don't get me wrong - men also have to balance (moreso than any generation before us):  being a good guy and being the bad boy, being a provider while encouraging independence, and the nightmare tightrope walk between being masculine and being sensitive.  Regardless of gender, though, learning to balance our many sides, desires, and needs is a universal human challenge.

The best we can do is to follow our hearts and remember to consciously choose who to be and how to pass our time.   Anytime life is out of balance, there are warning signs.   It could be a vague unhappiness, a health problem, or a flat out crisis ... but it always comes back to finding your own center.    There is no arbitrary line that offers us a formula for success or happiness.   The perfect amount of work for one person might completely exhaust another.   One woman might be empowered by sexual escapades that would embarrass another.  One man might be bored by a romantic interlude that inspires another.   

I find a simple rule of thumb effective :  

Moderation in all things, especially moderation. 
~Ralph Waldo Emerson

There's no such thing as too much - until I've had my fill.   There's no such thing as too little - until I yearn for more.   Most importantly, there's no such thing as perfect balance ... life is dynamic and no equilibrium exists in a vacuum.  Desires and energies shift.   Focus will wax and wane.   Day to day, year to year, I am a kaliedoscope of my facets - shifting and creating new beauty, only to shift again and recreate myself.   Whatever image you see when you look at me ... trust that I am already in motion, rearranging and catching different light, creating this moment's version of life at the speed of B.  Sometimes steady, sometimes teetering at the brink, always juggling passions as I walk this tightrope.  Below me lies a net ... or an endless void ... or a pit of fierce hungry alligators.  It really doesn't matter to me - I've no intention of falling.   Let the audience gasp at my antics high above the ground, let the world wonder at the feat for they are too afraid to climb, and let my steps be true for they are bold, timid, quick, measured, fearless and afraid - but always they are mine!

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